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| Xeogaming Forums - - Posts by Cairoi |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard.         Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Elara, because of the whole domain issues, I think we should just let people be able to post their entries into this weekend, if they can't make it by today/tommorow. If that's still not enough time for you, I understand. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Obviously, Xeogaming has been going through some tough technical times here, and a lack of communication has really been hurting activity, so I suggest we start a newsletter for emergency reasons.
Post your email address here or PM it to myself or another admin and should an emergency situation arise again, we can contact you all without the board itself. If you've got any suggestions, comments, concerns, voice them here as well. |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| OOC: Best I could do on short notice. Don't be too harsh. :/
On April 12th, it finally happened. Jacobs & Coffman's merged with Old Jackson's. It was the best news Hal had ever heard. Everyone else was sad that Old Jackson had closed down the shop, but he hadn't. This was the opportunity of Hal's lifetime. On April 13th, Hal had left the entire town behind without a trace. On April 15th, Hal set foot in Georgetown for the first time. He was dressed for success, cleaned and primed. Behind his charismatic glow, one could see the predatory gleam in his eyes. He had caught the sight of his prey, opportunity. Its green blood trickled down, teasing him. Fangs exposed, he was ready to live life his way. After securing the career of his life, he sat down upon a mossy park bench and cracked open a newspaper. He'd need a place to live, he reasoned. Thankfully, he'd saved a vast sum over the past seven years for just such an occasion. On April 16th, he stepped into Flower Meadow Condominiums for the first time. There hadn't been an ad for it in the paper, but he'd passed it just yesterday and fallen in love with it. He HAD to live there. He walked up to the cozy office building just next to the gated entrance, a lovely brick house with vines artfully etched upon the eroded bricks. Just inside, sitting behind a fortress of crisp papers, was a man. The man looked to be in his 50s, very well kept for his age. He had the look of a happy man who took as much joy in being homely as he did caring for the plants in his yards. A content man, set to live his life with a smile on his face. "Why, hello, young man! Never seen you around before. What can I do you for?" Hal's observation seemed to be on the money. The man's voice seemed to come from him like beams of sunlight. "Well, actually, if it's at all possible, I would really love to purchase a home here. I know it's short notice, but I'm really enamored by it." "Hmm..." The old man's face seemed to shift into a state of subdued dislike. "I'd be willing to pay more than the normal price. This place just kind of...fits the vision of a dream neighborhood for my dream life. Everything's going my way lately, sir. It's all falling into place. This is the final piece." The old man's face did not change for several seconds, an awkward silence hanging thick in the room. Suddenly, he snapped to life like an engine, jumping up and taking Hal by surprise. "You remind me of a young me, lad. Come see me tomorrow, I'll find you a home here." Hal heard a loud click. The click of the last jigsaw piece falling into place. On April 17th, Hal bought and moved into his condominium. He was busy looking it over, so he didn't really take a look around, but a loud dog had barked for almost an hour at 8 and he almost had a mind to complain. But he didn't. On April 19th, Hal walked outside to pick up his paper at 5 AM and saw the old man cutting the neighborhood's lawn. Smiling with surprise at the man's good will, he went back inside and felt warm in his heart the rest of the day, even at work. The dog's barking tainted the evening, however. On April 23rd, Hal tripped on a tricycle as he walked to his car on the morning. One of the neighborhood kids must've left it there. Strange though, he thought as he climbed in the car and started the ignition. He hadn't seen any kids yet. The days started to flow together. Each day became a routine, like it had before, but each day, something weird would happen. The neighborhood was like a painting. It was...almost too perfect. On May 3rd, a lovely Sunday, Hal decided to stay in and watch TV. He enjoyed the football games until around seven, when the dog started barking again. He tried to drown it out, but its forcefully loud voice demanded his attention. Angrily, he stormed out the door and headed towards the house down the street. It was a lovely evening, but the streets were bare, but this was muted to Hal. Hal stepped up to the door and began banging, causing the dog to bark louder. No sounds except the grain of static and the barking of the dog came from inside. Maybe...the owner was in trouble? Hal panicked and slammed the door with his shoulder, bursting it down. He instinctively ran to the sound of the television. He saw a hand on a chair facing the television, away from him. “Sir? Ma’am?!” He moved forward to see if the person was breathing. They weren’t. They were lifeless. The man sitting in the chair was a mannequin, made of porcelain. Hal’s heart skipped a beat. He stood there, locked in confusion and fear, until he saw a shadow in the corner of his eye. Fight or Flight. Flight. Fear filling his body like helium, he hovered across the stage as he booked it back home. He didn’t want to know what he’d seen. He just wanted to feel safe again. He leaped over the shrub in his front yard and landed hard, rolling into his door and shutting it. His mind and body desired one thing: The reassuring feeling of his pistol in his hands. He fetched it from the sugar cabinet in the kitchen and loaded it. It had been his father’s. Readying the gun, he made his way to the hallway and faced the doorway, waiting for someone to come. Seconds felt like hours, pinched slowly through the sadistic hourglass. Creak. That was the sound of someone behind him. He turned and fired instinctively, his eyes not even focused yet. With a pained grunt, the old man from the front fell to the ground, clutching his freshly red shirt. Hal didn’t know how to feel. He had taken a sharp intake of breath, and for the life of him, he could not release it. Was the man alive? He waited to move until the old man groaned. “Holy shit, sir! Are you ok?! I’m so sorry! I thought-” “It’s ok, lad. You had every reason.” An awkward silence hung thick in the room. Tears began to well in the old man’s eyes. “Your suspicions are correct, son. You and I are the only people who live in this neighborhood. Before you came along, it was just me.” “…Why?” “My father founded Flower Meadow Condominiums back in the sixties. In those days it was perfect. There was the O’Connell’s, the Williamson’s…It was wonderful. But ever since the murders that happened here in ’86…The place was abandoned. Rather than sell the land, I’ve kept it looking as beautiful as it was when I was a lad.” Hal kept silent, unsure of what to say. Guilt dug deeper into him than the bullet did the old man. “I’ve kept this place modernized to keep up this illusion, but it’s all been for nothing Listen, lad. You’re the first person I’ve let live here since the murders. You remind me of myself, back when I was young and limber.” The old man gasped in pain, and Hal moved in closer, wet eyes blurring his sight. “This bullet has sealed my fate, son. I’m not long for this world.” Hal choked on his tears, breaking apart. “Don’t cry. This is for the best.” “I’m so sorry, sir. I didn’t mean to, I really didn’t!” “I know, I know…Listen. You won me over when you said this condominium was your image of a dream world. That filled me with a hope I haven’t felt in many years. Take this land, this beautiful land I’ve spent so many years keeping safe for you, and make something of it. But don’t make my mistake and hog it to yourself. Flower Meadow is a slice of heaven on earth. Share it with others. Fill these streets with the laughter of children, and memories of summer nights. Fill it with a love of life, as I remember so very, very well.” On May 3rd, Hal watched the owner of Flower Meadow Condominiums pass into his final sleep. He carried the jolly old man down the streets of the community, a sole thought on his mind. He brought him to the namesake of the community, a simple field that was alive with a festival of colors upon the petals of flowers, and buried him. The next spring, a large picnic was held in the colorful park. Everyone complimented Hal on the lushness of the flowers and how well they came in. Only Hal could see how majestic the flowers had become. They had taken root in the love of the man, and grown brighter and more alive than the rays of the sun itself. |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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That is why I think of your puny stabbing head. |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| BEGIN
I'll begin with a classic: Ascension to SSJ2. Son Gohan. DBZ. Yeah. And if that's not good enough for you: |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Wow, just for the record, there was absolutely nothing behind the similarities in Makura and I's writings. We just both had the same idea.
XD |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Creativity: 8/10
I'm really impressed with the way you've taken your writing. This is really something different than what you've done in previous works and I'd say this shows a lot of creativity on your part. I can't get you full credit because the story of abuse and fighting isn't exactly novel, but you deserve credit for it. Spelling:10/10 Yeah, I don't know why we kept this category, but hey. A+ Grammar: 9/10 I can recall a few weird sentences here and there, but nothing really noticeable. Character: 8/10 The characters in this story really are well suited as kind of shapeless ideas, but small details, details that distinguish the characters from others of a similar breed really flesh them out. I'd suggest going back and fleshing these characters out a bit more. Plot:7/10 Very basic plot, but implemented well. I understand you've got more outside of this, and I think that's what would be best for the story. I really feel like if you had given more things to make this story its own, it would've been a lot better. Overall: 42/50. Great job. |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Creativity: 9/10
The repetition and synchronization of feeling, the way you wrote was very creative and fresh. It was very poetic. Spelling and Grammar:18/20 Noticed a few errors here and there (example:the boy could here his father). Some sentences felt weird going down. Character:9/10 Very good, fleshed out characters. A bit too typical, but still real. Plot:8/10 It was very new for you to implement historical fiction, but in the case of the time period, you used the two most publicized events, and almost stereotypically. Overall: 44/50 You're an amazing writer, Makura.  |
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Yeah, your judging will still count. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Yeah, we're lacking a lot of entries. Anyone who's willing to enter the contest please do so ASAP. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Cairoi This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days |
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| Well yeah, this sucks, but I still think J.K. Rowling is a talented writer. She made books popular with people that books normally AREN'T popular with. That's good work on any account. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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Originally posted by Shuyin Twitch. I'm afraid, man. I really am.
Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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A young man passes through the door, oblivious of where he now stood. The temporary blinding gifted by the spotlight failed to give him the senses to realize this world behind the door was not the same as the world behind the door he was headed to. When this finally dawned upon him, the was shut. Click.
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He pulled the cigarette from his thin lips and eyed the man some ways away from himself. "Care to explain, friend?"
Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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Originally posted by Shuyin Snake or Ice Climbers are not THAT good. Snake is much better than Ice Climbers, at least from what I've seen. The whole desynching strategy is great, but I've been able to best it when it's used each time.
Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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The young man watched the colorful affair unfurl before his eyes while taking an extended drag of his cigarette. With a cloud of smoke veiling his face for just a moment, he spoke.
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"Huh. Nice effects. Name's Jonas. Nice to meet you." The young man cracked his knuckles, his chestnut brown eyes eying up this bizarre man. He parted his lengthy dirty-blonde hair, giving himself a better view. "Look, I've got a date tonight with this gorgeous babe, so if we could just wrap this up quick, that'd be wonderful." Jonas stepped forward, getting into a light defensive position, his right arm slightly lifted up towards Sir King Kai. "Whenever you're ready, rainbow man."
Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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You fools, Uwe Boll is NOT the least of our worries anymore. I did research into this.
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This is created by the same people who did the remake of BLACK CHRISTMAS. And they made the FINAL DESTINATION movies. The person playing Goku is the guy who starred in THE INVISIBLE. I'll provide Youtube Links to all of these terrible movies to give you a feel as to how grim this is to us. Black Christmas Final Destination The Invisible I've seen The Invisible. It was not a good movie. Cool concept ruined by bad acting.
Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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Big Sis is now a twentysomething!
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How's your birthday going? What'd you get, gift wise?
Tell ussssssss!
Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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Yeah, I'm with the vast (essentially absolute) majority here when I say the board shouldn't go down.
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This forum is a damn home to some of us. Sure, we might not attract a vast sum of new members, but we're a tight knit group. I know every active poster fairy well, some a lot more than others. I'd count several here as close friends. Xeo, we're basically a close group of friends that all met on a forum and kept the forum around because we like each other so much. We're loyal to you and to each other, and that's not really something you normally see on the internet. I trust all of you enough I'd drive out around the country to meet you all in person. I love this board and you guys. Losing it would be like watching a piece of my life kind of drift away.
Cairoi |
This isn't about you and your loud mouth, This is about me and my fucking beard. Since: 08-29-04 From: PA Since last post: 4640 days Last activity: 4263 days
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Rogue, one day I plan on visiting all of you guys in CA. |
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| Xeogaming Forums - - Posts by Cairoi |
