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| Pockets Posts: 248/838 |
Ry, I hate to say it but I agree with your teachers in part.
I used to think exactly like you do. I was always bullied in school, teased, hit, tormented and picked on. I had a horrible temper and I would explode with the slightest provocation. I wanted to hit every teacher that said to me, "Just ignore them and they'll stop." It was SOO irritating to listen to them spout that shit at me. What did they know about it? I thought. Honestly. They were right. When I got into Highschool I didn't know anyone. Nobody knew that if they bugged me I'd explode cause of my temper. And I didn't draw attention to myself so they had no reason to torment me. That allowed me to work on my temper and some did find out and tried to bug me. Really. Don't tell them, "Stop it." But if you ignore them, as if they don't exist or aren't worth your time eventualy they WILL lose interest. If they're pestering doesn't get a reaction out of you it isn't fun anymore cause that really is their whole reason for bugging you. Your reactions entertain them like a little kid poking a pill bug just to watch it curl up into a little ball. It's not gonna be easy I won't lie to you. But it DOES work. It takes time and a little patience but eventually it WILL pay off. You just gota be willing to work with it. |
| Bitmap Posts: 69/7838 |
Of course i have grown into my lifestyle of stress and anxiety. But living in an invironment where your put on the spot, or worse, abused, is quite a terrifying experience. However I keep telling myself the same damn thing every time i come into physical contact with my dad.
"Dont worry, whatever dosent kill you, makes you stronger..." Ive been beaten up before for no reason, not only by my dad, but Stanly Morgan (See THE story thread in story relm) so Im pretty much used to getting beat up...especially the fact that im deaf in one ear. Dont worry Katana, be strong and have faith. Keep all of your friends close, and just be strong! |
| Ryan Posts: 208/1748 |
I was abused quite badly at one point... although it wasn't family issues. I had people at my school, younger and older, who bullied me, hit me, called me names etc. It has died down a bit since my mum and dad went to the school but there are still quite a few people who are doing it and our school is supposed to be preventing bullying? All the teachers say if they see them do it is "Stop doing that" then walk off. That's REALLY going to prevent it   |
| Katana Posts: 161/3649 |
**hugs** Omg...That's just the thing that pisses me off...a parent who puts his or her child in danger is just as good as the one who does it...I'm sorry if you take any offense to that Jin...
Like I'm not a mother myself yet...but, as I think I've mentioned before, if anyone were to happen to my nieces, nephews, and little sisters...whatever god out there, help them. I'm petrified of my father...but all it took was for him to one day just scare my little sister into her thinking that he was going to hurt her, and next thing I knew, I had him against the wall. Same with my oldest brother-in-law, when he hurt my big sister and niece. My dad...just like both Jin and Sajin, he's an abusive prick. He doesn't hit me anymore and isn't really so much of a problem...no, because my FBI agent uncle got involved. He's a little guy. Only like 5'6 and maybe 120...but scary as all hell. My biggest mistakes with him was trying to get away from him when he was hitting me. Ever since I was a little kid, he'd raise his hand to me. He never hit me with an object or anything...threw things, yes, but it was always his fist he's used to smack me...which is what's scary. I was 4 the first time he broke one of my ribs, and he did it with one single blow. Him being 20 at the time, yah...seems likely that it wouldn't be too difficult to hit a 4-year-old like that...but I mean he's done things like that even when I was older...one single blow every time. He was one of the reasons for my sparatic depression...but the point is...I did have something done about him...and part of what helped me through some of his shit was advice from people on this very board. It truly did. I even got good advice from someone who hated me, so yah...Which is why that I'm always open to talk and I want to make sure that that gets across to all you guys...I just...I've seen what happens to people who have these problems and don't get anything done about it...sometimes just simply talking to someone can help. It just might make all the difference and be what drives the person to get something done about the situation and put themselves in a better one. |
| Jin Posts: 179/546 |
Katana, I can relate in too big of a way..
Both myself and my mom have suffered at the hand of two of her abusive husbands.. I can remember a time my step dad locked the bathroom door and took off his belt and beat the shit out of me with the metal part. My back still has marks from that. And I was like 11 at the time.. My real dad was just as bad towards my mom. And I ended up in foster care for a period of time when my real dad dropped me which resulted in 2 broken legs and a concussion. My mom is still with my step dad.. He doesn't hit me anymore because he knows I'm bigger and a hell of alot smarter than him. Doesn't stop him from making me feel like shit every chance he gets though. Still to this day I can't figure out why my mom let this happen to her and myself. I still can't forgive her. I've had a pretty fucked up childhood. And that's only from the "abusive dads" part. |
| Katana Posts: 159/3649 |
Sweetie, don't be sorry for anything. That was a truly terrifying experience for you all...**huggles** I'm so sorry.
If this thread upsets anyone in any way, then please close it immediately. Abuse is a personal and terrifying subject...I just needed to get that off my chest really and like I dunno...today was the last straw. I'm so sick of these very real cases of abuse in my life...some of the abuse has been toward myself, and those I love very much. I talked to a lot of people tonight, like my family, friends, etc...I talked a lot to my little sisters, and my oldest nieces and nephew. The other kids are really little, so to prevent them from being in abusive situations, I'm sticking to just simply trying to set good examples until they get older and I won't be afraid to scar them by talking to them... But living with the slightest insecurity can lead to people accepting such an abusive life...and like...it's wrong. That was just the situation for my aunt in a nutshell, and there's been other instances of abuse in my life...and just...rather than sit back and say that it pisses me off that that stuff happens, I'm doing something about it. I'm talking to people and all so that's the true purpose of this thread...if there's something that peole need to get off their chest, or like...just I'm always available to talk to if someone is in this sort of situation somehow, nor knows someone who is or whatever... And Sagin...**hugs** I'm really sorry...and I hope that you'll do something about it as well...no one should deal with abusive parents...it does more to you than physically, that's for damned sure. |
| Bitmap Posts: 64/7838 |
My father, a prime example!
I remember one time when my sister was spreading lies about my dad behind his back, well anyways she got caught and my father was pissed. It was close to 8 months ago, My father told me to get dressed and that im going over to my moms house for dinner. He was..i dunno, silent the whole time. Well, we pull up to moms house and my sister, Christine, Runs in the house crying, I was pretty ignorant in the situation, so i diddnt realize what was going on at the time. Well my father walks in the house and just looses his cool. He puts 4 holes on the wall next to her head. ohh, the sound of her screaming and him yelling still chills me, and all I can do was watch...I was scared to face my father. And during the whole time, my Nanny (My other Grandmother from FL) was there, she just runs in the bathroom, terrified. When finally he calmed down, I was literally shaking in my pants, like, he was my ride HOME! I was shaking my head with tears in my eyes begging my mom to take me home that night. (What made her take me was when I started throwing up, I do that when im stressed or scared...) Now im 17, my dads a crackhead, and im still scared of him, not because of his strength, but because hes...my dad. I still remember when he broke my hand when I was 10, cause i slammed the door in his face. Yeah Katana, ive been in your situation also! My dad would just bully his new girlfriend (whom also is a crackhead...and I loathe her...). and in front of my Grandmother also...I swear I hate him.... I havent been beaten by him, but I always come close. Every time I stand up to him, something just tells me to just...let it go. Katana, i know this may sound origional, but if he continues to persist, either Contact the police, or call an abusive hotline, Theyll find somehow to get rid of him... Sorry, thats all I have  |
| Katana Posts: 158/3649 |
It just baffles me how much some people can take...or do for the matter...it truly does.
Like those stupid women cases...My aunt Gina came by for a visit today and she's back with th esame asshole AGAIN!!! He beats the shit outta her. My aunt is 25 years old, and let's just say that I have an inch and 5 pounds on her. She's a very tiny woman and he just...beats the hell outta her pretty much...and she's back with him after a third time!! He calls her fat and ugly...and really she's skinny and beautiful, she really is....and like I dunno...that's the basic summary of the situation... What pisses me off the most though, is that she has a three-year-old-son, and he watches the abuse and is abused from time to time as well...It's one thing to make a stupid decision for yourself, but...When people hurt their kids, or just kids in general....being the kid person that I am, it just tears me apart. No, she isn't abusing her son, but she's putting him in those situations, and she does nothing to stop it when she sees it!!! I hate being so judgemental here, because I've made some stupid mistakes...stayed with people that I shouldn't have, and out up with crap too long...but I'll tell you, those VERY rare times when ANY of them had put a hand up to me....well wouldn't be much of a hockey player if I let that happen, now would I? But like I dunno...even my baby sisters or nieces and nephews...they're my babies, and if I was ever with someone who would harm them in ANY way...I'd drop their ass both figuratively and literally... Yet my aunt lets this stuff happen to her...and her own son!!! Yah, I know that's a bit personal information...but I mean it's stuff that you normally hear on the news...has now become very real to me...and I mean...if there's anyone here who is unsure of themselves enough to even THINK about allowing this to happen...We're going to have a talk, because it's not normal, and it's not right. Or if anyone knows of instances that pisses them off like that and they need to get it off their chest, then please do. |
