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Xeogaming Forums - - Posts by Xeoman |
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Xeoman Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days |
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Depressed mother, pregnant sister, clueless father, noisy dogs...
etc, yeah it's all a long story but I definitely think I probably should have moved out several years ago. When I think about it, my life hasn't amounted to much over the last ~5-6 years we've been stuck in this crappy place. Been having all these ups and downs with anxiety (lately), depression, all this other crazy stuff... I have thought about it so much that I pretty much know 100% at this point, when I move out things will change dramatically and for the best. I need independence, my own responsibilities, choices, actions, place, everything. I definitely think I'm the type that got stuck... was just too comfortable, and now I'm ready to completely throw myself out in a new environment. It is way overdue. So stoked. Ready to live life. The problem is just waiting for my friend and his lease with his dad to end in October, but we're hoping for September... but it's already so late. I can't tell if he really wants to do this or not, he seems to be dodging some discussions and I try to bring up that we need to sit down and plan things out, but yeah. He's like me and needs a good boot to the ass to get moving sometimes, but eh... I'm really focused on myself right now and don't want to be overbearing. I feel like he needs to overcome and figure out things himself right now. He is the only friend of mine I think I'd really like to live with, but I'm already thinking I need to start looking for one bedroom apartments as well for a backup plan. Another friend of mine who's in the medical field is wanting to buy a house sometime next year and will be looking for roommates. I WILL be out of this house by this October no matter what, but if things are crazy he's definitely said I could move into his place and pay him some rent. So that's an option for the near future. As everyone says living with a roommate is the best way to go about this, plus I think it'd be fun and I don't want to be alone or seclude myself even more... but yeah, the priority is escaping this prison. So even if I'm stuck alone, I'll deal with it. Utterly ready for some drastic changes to happen asap. Insanely stressed out to say the least lately, barely holding unto this job. It's super fucking stressful, but it's the best pay I've had by far and I don't know if I could match it elsewhere, and I need stable income to move out soon (though I have a good savings...), so yeah. Things are just crazy right now. Trying to find distractions to keep me busy. On the cliff to some crazy mental breakdowns, but hopefully I can make it. (Last edited by X on 08-13-12 01:24 AM) |
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Xeoman Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days |
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Crazy, crazy!
So I think that makes it altogether at least 10 years old... pretty sure I was doing this stuff when I was 14-ish, so yeah, 10 years ago. Man internet time is the strangest thing. |
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Xeoman Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days |
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Goes to show how much I know about photography! | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Xeoman Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days |
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?
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Xeoman Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days |
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It'll do. I'll give you guys more in another 10 years! | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
(restricted)
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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Xeoxama!
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*signs*
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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That guys face is the very definition of douche.
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Just sayin!
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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Oh wow talk about a nostalgia bomb, but ... the "were" bothers me. |
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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The original Indiana Jones is coming back here in November or something. Totally stoked.
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Seriously how have theaters not had the idea to have a permanent theater or two for old movies? That would be incredible.
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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Will I ever post again? |
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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lol, I think no matter what I did it would've been anti-climatic.
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But yeah this is pretty crazy. I've wanted to hit this milestone since I started posting on AB's. Still fun to think what our combined post counts would be on top of MoD and all.
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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I may or may not be around much on Friday, not sure. |
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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Hey!
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I'm from KS. Go figure. Moved to Tennessee for a year or two when my parents got married and my dad was in the military. It sucked because I was always sick there. Some mean kid also ran into me with a big wheel knocking my baby teeth out. Our neighbors were obsessed with X-Men but my parents were religious tyrants back then, so of course I could have nothing to do with it since "evolution" was involved! Crazy times. Now I'm back in KS and have moved around far too many times. Finally ready to get out of here and be on my own, never looking back, think my buddy and I got a place picked out. Damn I cannot wait to be away from my family! I've always liked computers and technology. I was messing with rom hacking and emulation back in like 6th grade... eventually I found out that most of those sites back then had Acmlm Boards, and well the rest is history there. Back on the rom hacking, I always dreamed of editing my own worlds in Super Metroid and Link to the Past, but after editors came out, I just didn't have the patience for it or something haha. I don't even really play rom hacks anymore or have much interest in it. Guess I'm too authentic and just prefer the actual games or something. I loathe programming (like to think I'm more imaginative than logical), but still did a bit of it throughout high school while I tinkered with some php and stuff for the boards on the side. Web Design I enjoyed though, and always hated using Dreamweaver, I liked just doing everything manually by hand. But then my junior year hit and our school had a Game Design program, so I jumped into that. Had a blast those last two years, my homeroom/study hour or whatever was in that class for my senior year, so I was just there for three hours a day messing around heh. I ended up getting an endorsement by going the extra mile and doing a little extra work, had to do a speech in front of a few hundred people which was an accomplishment in itself, and yeah. Then we had an end of the year game day after school with our class... we had a Street Fighter II tournament and I won, got like $50 to Best Buy or something haha, my friend who was the runner up champion was so pissed the rest of the night... was pretty funny. The worst part about this venture, is that my friends and I don't have our work anymore. I thought it was on some backed up CD/DVD's or something, but I can't find anything. Two years worth of so much work, all gone. Pretty depressing, but they live on in my memories I guess. My favorite projects were level design (I grew up drawing sidescrolling levels for like Vectorman and stuff, haha). I remember we did some castle, exterior and interior, an Unreal-map kind of thing, an F-Zero track like thing, and probably some other stuff. Character design and animations were the hardest things for me. All that gets me thinking if maybe I'd like CAD or not, since I love bare bones design/architecture. Definitely something I might look into someday. Afterwards or during the Game Design course, it just hit me that despite my love for videogames, I didn't want my hobby turning into a tiresome job. Most might say that's crazy thinking, but yeah. That and Game Design is damn tough, I just didn't have the patience for it. Maybe I need more instant satisfaction for a job or something, but yeah. Like I remember when we worked on our character models, it was weeks on end worth of work. Just took forever to see results. It was certainly worth it, but yeah. To rewind a bit there, I was playing videogames back when I was 2-3... my grandpa had an NES and would always rent me a game per week (I was pretty spoiled when my mom and I lived with my grandparents for awhile heh). I always went with Megaman games. 20 years later that might explain how I got all the achievements in MM9-10 (including Mr. Perfect, not getting hit... ). My dad's friend also just gave me a copy of Blaster Master, which has stuck with me forever, still one of my absolute favorites. My late grandpa, we always used to play the TMNT games together since you could do co-op and we'd often clear the game, awesome stuff. We played some Battletoads too. Great memories. It probably wasn't until the N64 era when I started actually calling videogames "videogames", before then it was all "Nintendo games", haha. How the times change... not too big on Nintendo anymore. But Zelda and Metroid are still my two favorite franchises, so I still keep buying their consoles for them alone. I'm going to have to do inventory on my collection all over again someday, but I'd guess at this point I probably own over 400 games, this does not include anything on Steam or digital copies. My largest collections are the SNES, PSX, and PS2. My favorite systems all around are the SNES, PSX, Genesis/NES, and it goes from there. Never been too into handheld gaming and after being in a car wreck several years back that kind of messed up my neck for good, it's just not something I could really enjoy anyways. Actually never watched anime alone back in jr. high and high school, well I did watch Toonami and Adult Swim, but never bought anything. Just caught stuff at my friends places. Now I seem to be the only one still totally into it, haha. Got back into it on my own after high school and haven't looked back. I grew up loving Guns n' Roses, Queensryche, etc, so I guess it was natural that someday I'd be hooked on metal. Just took me a few years since my dad prevented me from listening to any of it during my youth. I've lived and breathed Star Wars most of my life, OT of course. Still probably my favorite movies all around and it's just timeless stuff that sticks with you forever. After that, I'd probably honestly say Jurassic Park is my other favorite. I've always been fascinated by dinosaurs and stuff. Right now I'm just a hopeless romantic guy in his 20's trying to find my part in this world. Things have been pretty crazy and not so crazy, but I can't wait for some big changes ahead. Looking for new hobbies and hopefully new careers, as I can assure anyone that mail order pharmacies is just a codename for "prison". ... not where I want to be forever, not at all.
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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I'm back. |
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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Happy birthday lady! Hope you're doing well, don't see you around much anymore. |
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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It's fun to see we have a total of 128,750+ posts on the board. Pretty crazy! |
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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?
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I don't make very many big posts anymore, THAT'S WHAT YOU GET!
Xeoman |
Ball and Chain Trooper Administrator Since: 08-14-04 From: 255 Since last post: 65 days Last activity: 53 days
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Maybe I'm too nice? I tend to blame my high school a bit there on that one. It was a brand new school at the time and offered a ton of technical programs, my three year class and the older people that went there... you can figure it was a pretty geeky demograph. Now I'd love nothing more than to end up with a cool geek as well, but I think the ratio of guys to girls there had to be like 3:1 or something, the school was pretty big but didn't have a ton of people, so it was never really crowded and there didn't seem to be a lot of opportunities to meet people. I was still more introverted back then, but opening up a bit... talked to a handful of ladies and had some female friends in some classes, but yeah nothing really happened.
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Since then, I've only really had a small group of friends or two. The women that came into one group always went for the other guys, but it didn't take me long to be thankful of that since most of them that came into that circle were people I definitely wouldn't want to be in a relationship with. I think I do get insecure and jealous easily sometimes though, maybe due to the lack of relationship history. I don't know. Also, maybe because I've had a better relationship with my mom over my dad, I find myself to be a lot more open (about personal matters) and trusting with women... which I guess could easily be a double edged sword. lol, I know if I were to lock someone in though, I'd be assertive and wouldn't be walked all over. Not at all. Who knows really, always had tons of female friends back in my early school days before high school... then something happened I guess. Now I'm kind of just stuck and not meeting people, so it's something I have to work on and fix myself at this point. I won't ever be overbearing and desperate, but yeah a co-pilot right now would be awesome. I only really have one close friend whom I can talk about anything with, other than a handful of people and places like here online. So yeah, could use another close friend I could trust and do anything with. Enough of that, haha. |
Xeogaming Forums - - Posts by Xeoman |