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| Xeogaming Forums - Sunset Waterfall - My grandma died |
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Elara Divine Mamkute Dark Elf Goddess Chaos Imp Penguins Fan Ms. Invisable          Since: 08-15-04 From: Ferelden Since last post: 102 days Last activity: 102 days |
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| My paternal grandmother died last night from a combination of copd and emphysema. She was the grandparent that I was closest to, and I feel rather odd... to be cliche, it is like there is a hole now. We knew it was coming, and I know that it is good because she is no longer in pain... but I still feel a tightness in my chest and the urge to cry alternating with a profound feeling of... emptiness. I have been having trouble keeping food down, as normal when my nerves are this shot... previously only really bad breakups got that reaction.
There is so much that I want to say, but I have no idea how or to whom. I was so young when my other grandma died, and I only saw her a few times... but this one was a fixture in my life and I am taking it much harder as a result. My dad said he might fly me out for the funeral but we don't know yet. Ben said he would come as well if I wanted him to, which I appreciate. I really wish that more of my friends were around right now... I could do with the distraction. |
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True Flight The One Since: 08-21-04 Since last post: 102 days Last activity: 102 days |
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| My condolences to you. I wish there was more I could say. | |||
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Rogue If you're reading this... You are the Resistance Since: 08-17-04 Since last post: 636 days Last activity: 444 days |
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I'm so sorry, Crystle. 
You're definitely missed out here. Though I wish it were under different circumstances, it would be great to see you if you come out and have the time. |
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Elara Divine Mamkute Dark Elf Goddess Chaos Imp Penguins Fan Ms. Invisable Since: 08-15-04 From: Ferelden Since last post: 102 days Last activity: 102 days |
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| I would enjoy that. Ben and I were talking about using the opportunity to visit with people so to not make the entire trip a somber occasion. | |||
Katana Dark Wizard \"She said tonight...come on come on collide...see what I fire feels like..I bet its just like heaven.\"  Since: 08-15-04 From: Philadelphia, P.A. Since last post: 1557 days Last activity: 1374 days |
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Originally posted by Elara I hope you can get as much cheer out of the trip as possible. I'm so sorry hun. It's not easy, but I'm glad you're utilizing some outlets rather than internalizing it all. I wish there was something I could do.  |
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Belial Bazu Since: 01-29-05 From: New Zealand Since last post: 4367 days Last activity: 3981 days |
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| I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. I'm glad you're able to take comfort in that she is no longer suffering, though I've no doubt that it still hurts. Losing someone close is a terrible feeling... and I completely relate to the "hole." Best wishes to you and a safe flight to and from California. |
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Elara Divine Mamkute Dark Elf Goddess Chaos Imp Penguins Fan Ms. Invisable Since: 08-15-04 From: Ferelden Since last post: 102 days Last activity: 102 days |
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| So we got here safely and it is so surreal being back. It is super warm to me and the dryness is making me cough. I am so looking forward to seeing people though! Downside is that my being kinda sick reduced the effectiveness of the sudafed I took to keep my ears from going nuts on the plane. Gods it hurt! But at least I can hear. | |||
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Rogue If you're reading this... You are the Resistance Since: 08-17-04 Since last post: 636 days Last activity: 444 days |
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| So we're all on for Thursday? Brandon and I are open and up for anything.
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Elara Divine Mamkute Dark Elf Goddess Chaos Imp Penguins Fan Ms. Invisable Since: 08-15-04 From: Ferelden Since last post: 102 days Last activity: 102 days |
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| Looks like it. Ben created a facebook event thingy for Rockbottom to get a better idea of who all is coming and I added your names to it. Rosy said Pat might be in town? That would be neat.
We are going to the zoo today with his dad since he has free passes... Ben just woke up so we should be on the way soon. I've confirmed that I hate driving my dad's Saturn Ion... such a stupid car! I've been asked to say a few words at the funeral... I have to think about that today and just what I want to say. Kinda nervous to tell the truth. |
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Rogue If you're reading this... You are the Resistance Since: 08-17-04 Since last post: 636 days Last activity: 444 days |
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Originally posted by Elara You'll do great, honey. Since she was the grandparent you were closest with, you'll probably have a lot to say. I don't want to get cliche, but speak from the heart. |
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Elara Divine Mamkute Dark Elf Goddess Chaos Imp Penguins Fan Ms. Invisable Since: 08-15-04 From: Ferelden Since last post: 102 days Last activity: 102 days |
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| Sitting in the funeral parlor right now and nerves are setting in again. When we first got here I couldn't go into the room. I still can't be near the casket for too long or my composure cracks. |
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