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| Xeogaming Forums - Sunset Waterfall - When Life Gives You Lemons..... |
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True Flight The One         Since: 08-21-04 Since last post: 112 days Last activity: 112 days |
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| As Williams would say, "Kill..." Thanks needed to keep that in mind heh.
kill... It's something I wish that I could do right now. I have been given the most lemons yesterday and today. More than ever i never thought that I was going to be the one receiving the butt end to this for days. Since I never really understood how a mother's guilt and love combined feels, I figured out how it felt this weekend. Saturday at 5:00 pm I sat with my mom and dad at Logan's and told them my plans on transferring over to a National Guard Unit to go to Afghanistan. However it did not go as planned.... At the beginning of my dinner we waited to be seated and my mother told me that Sam, the son of my mother's coworkers who is an MP, got orders to go over to Afghanistan. Sam is an MP and has seen so much that he has gone crazy with post traumatic stress disorder. I never really thought about that and she started with a sentence that hit me real hard. "I don't want you to go over there. I wouldn't live if you went over there." I fidgeted during the entire conversation. She was smiling at me as I said grimly "I can understand where Sam was coming from since he found it hard to tell his parents about leaving to Afghanistan." My mother replied with, "I thought that was why you brought us here this afternoon." That was when I brought the news. She cried and told me I was never going to have her blessing. I guess.... I guess she forgot the true reason I brought her out there. I didn't bring the two out there for a blessing, though it would've been nice. I brought my parents out to dinner for their support. I really didn't care if I got their blessing or not. I wanted support. They brought everything to my attention saying that I was taking a detour in my plans. Guys... THIS IS NOT A DETOUR. This is part of my plans. I don't want everyone thinking that I'm just trying to get out getting a commission. It's not. I'm going over to learn more about being a soldier. I never really sat there and said, "Hey... I wanna go out and stay enlisted." No people my goal is to be a LT, just right now is not a good time for me to transition to that people. At that dinner I felt hatred, anger, loathing, sadness, depression, fear, and low all in one from my parents. I felt their disappointment and their aggression towards this. They held a huge vendetta all weekend long and attacked me through texting my brother and sister. It said, "You knew about Sarah and going to Afghanistan. I can't believe you support this stupid decision." This made everything I felt at dinner multiply three times. I never wanted to hear this, see this, or even feel this. My brother and sister stood there... Right by my side the entire time. Today was crazy, my grands are fully supportive and they gave me their acceptance on this issue. However my mother sent me another text, this time attacking my sister telling me that she was a little bitch and that all the advice she gave me was out of pure meanness. This has gone too far. This is labeling me as weak and unable to think for myself. My mother has GOT to stop this charade and make some sense. If she's going to try and attack me through my support she is absolutely wrong. I swear this feels worse than when people come out to their parents saying that they are gay. |
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Cteno Super Shotgun Moderator Since: 01-11-05 Since last post: 104 days Last activity: 102 days |
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| Although I hate war and I hate fighting, whether be it for peace or whatever, I feel that whatever you choose is right. You have my full support and while I'm not a religious man, I'll pray for your safe return.
It may be hard for your parents to cope because you're their little girl and they are concerned about your safety. Just try to think of it from their point of view and don't take what your mother says too personally because that's how all good mothers get. EDIT: ...and when life gives you lemons, turn them in to grape juice and make everybody else wonder how the hell you did it! (Last edited by Valhalla on 03-02-09 01:41 AM) |
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Elara Divine Mamkute Dark Elf Goddess Chaos Imp Penguins Fan Ms. Invisable  Since: 08-15-04 From: Ferelden Since last post: 112 days Last activity: 112 days |
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| Honestly, it is your decision and your life and you should not let them or anyone else make you feel bad about your choice. While I don't think that it is worse than coming out of the closet (I highly doubt you'd be disowned or disinherited for going to Afghanistan) I can understand that it is in no way easy for you.
You have the support of the rest of your family, and that is good enough. I don't know if your grandparents have any sway with you mother or father, but you could perhaps get them to explain to them that what they are doing is childish and, to be blunt, a perfect example of horrible parenting. I think it is a good thing that you want to go out an get some field experience before becoming a Lieutenant, as it will help you later on the earn the respect of anyone placed under your command. I did a lot of reading in my Vietnam class about how enlisted soldiers resented their officers because they had no real experience. I know that some soldiers still feel that way today. So, like I said, kudos to you and if your parents can't accept it then to hell with them. |
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